My Story

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Hello,

         My name is Charlotte, I am a fully qualified counsellor and I have developed Timeless Talk to create a safe confidential space for people to come and chat with me in order to navigate through the difficult things life throws at us. I have gone through the hell that is perimenopause myself since 2017 and have gathered a lot of very helpful information that I would like to use to help other women and the people around them in this situation.

I have experienced grief due to many different circumstances like suicide, dementia, stroke and also pet loss. 

I have been providing bereavement support for the last two years, including pet loss.   

I am very approachable, kind, relaxed, objective and non judgemental with a lot of common sense and a very good listener. 

Read each section of my story below to get a better understanding of how I can help you. 

My menopause journey started at the age of 34, so a little bit on the early side. I started to feel tired and weak every now and again and then I had a few dizzy spells, I went to the doctor and they thought I had picked up a bug and advised plenty of fluids and rest, this happened about 4 times in about 6 months. All of a sudden the dizziness increased and I began having anxiety and panic attacks every day, it got to the point that the anxiety and panic attacks would be happening from when I got up until I went to bed, I started to look forward to bedtime from the moment I woke up every day.  

I went back to the doctors and was prescribed an antidepressant called Sertraline, I only took one and I had the worst panic attack I have ever experienced and had suicidal feelings, I threw the rest in the bin. Over the next year I was prescribed a very strong antihistamine which knocked me out for two days, an anti-psychotic which I didn't take and basically fobbed off.

It was my mum who diagnosed me in the end as she had gone through the same thing at the age of 32 and recognised the symptoms, by this time I was waking up in the night wet through with cold sweats, my ears would always be itchy, I was passing out but somehow staying on my feet and the brain fog was horrendous, I genuinely couldn't remember how to spell my own surname some days, I couldn't think straight, I wasn't as organised as I've always been, I struggled to think of the word I wanted to say and had to describe scenarios to my friends for them to help guess which word I was thinking of, I struggled to speak most of the time and even got behind with my bills which is something I hadn't done since I first moved away from home.

I went back to the doctors and they did a blood test but it didn't show any changes in my hormones, I kept going back and having blood tests because by this point I was desperate for the panic attacks to stop, they sent me to our local hospital to see a specialist, she asked me a million questions and then said she wouldn't allow me to try HRT, I asked why not but she would only allow me to have a coil fitted but I refused due to other medical issues, my doctors allowed me to try HRT and the panic attacks and anxiety stopped straight away so this proved I was right, the specialist at the hospital told the doctors that I couldn't have the HRT medication and to take me off it straight away, I was devastated and the panic attacks and anxiety came back. I even went to see a private doctor which proved to be quite expensive but that didn't help either. I was so desperate to feel normal again, to not feel like I was going crazy or like I might have dementia that I even though about suicide, I didn't want to die but I was so desperate for the symptoms to stop it did cross my mind, my children were the one thing that kept me from acting out on these thoughts.  

I kept going back to the doctors until they eventually referred me to a different specialist, a man, he was wonderful and allowed the doctors to let me back on HRT and I was on them for 3 years, I am now 42 and nearing the end of perimenopause and I have my life back thank goodness. During this time I did an awful lot of research and as a qualified counsellor and almost an expert in all things perimenopause and menopause I really want to support other women going through their own journey, I want to give everyone all of this information to help you through your journey so you don't have to wait or fight and suffer like I did, we shouldn't have to fight for this anyway but that's the way it is at the moment unfortunately.

I have lost a few special people throughout my life, I have lost loved ones to suicide, stroke, dementia, drug overdose and also pets.  

All bereavements are a shock and can be absolutely devastating in so many different ways, it never fully leaves you and there is certainly no time limit on grief.

Some people say they can't understand why we haven't gotten over it yet or that we are being silly by mourning a pet but we are all different, our circumstances are different and we still have so much love to give to those we have lost, but when they aren't here for us to to shower our love over them, it comes out as grief instead, we can't help it.

We have to try our best to grow around it.

I have been providing grief support for the last 2 years, and I used to provide pet bereavement support when working for a pet hospice. I have spoken to so many different people from all walks of life but we all have grief and bereavement in common.

I can help by using talking therapies, being a listening ear, providing different methods of self care and ways of working through your grief to help you move forward in a positive direction.

These options are for when you need someone impartial to speak to about something that is on your mind or you're struggling to figure something out but you don't feel that friends and family are quite the right people to speak to.  

You may live alone, don't have any friends and family around you or you may not be able to get out and about to socialise and would just really like some company.

You don't always need a counsellor, sometimes you simply need a sounding board.

I am polite, friendly, honest, a very good listener, I have good common sense and happy to chat about anything and everything.